Doctor Who Series 10, Episode 9 Review - Empress of Mars
- SimplyWho
- Oct 3
- 3 min read
Updated: Oct 6
What did you think of this episode?
Sonic!
Good!
Bumpy-wumpy!
Exterminate!
Empress of Mars is another Doctor Who episode that surprised me on rewatch. I enjoyed it much more than I thought I would.
With that said, my brain was racing the whole way through it, causing me to have something of an epiphany. It's been rumbling in the background of my mind for some time but it jumped to the front of the queue whilst I watched this. The British (generally English though) are absolute cunts. All that talk of the empire did for me.
The British Empire itself is nothing to be proud of. Where has all the stealing and killing got this nation? Where has it left the world?
I am writing this quite far in advance, so God knows what will be going on by the time this is published, but right now in England people are putting flags up and drawing crosses on roundabouts. It's not a matter of being proud to come from Enguuuurland doing this, oh no, it is thick twats who read the scum and listen to Nigel fucking Farage.
"That's why you helped him come home. To claim Mars in the name of Queen Victoria, to loot it of its riches, stake a claim. The red planet turned pink."
These bald, middle aged coke heads claim asylum seekers are a danger to women and children - and I suspect the majority of them are also scum reading coke heads who like a scrap at the footy as well. The type of bellends who stormed Wembley at the Euros final, and yes, women and kids would have been petrified during that embarrassing day.
If I could have my way then these complete oxygen wasters would be booted out of their houses (I suspect a lot are council houses, ironically), have their cocaine and Stella supply cut off, chuck them on a dinghy and send them on their way across the channel.
These people are vile, but they are nothing compared to the vermin who easily sway these thick twats in the direction they want them to go. The media, the billionaires, the rich, the politicians.
Scum, sub human scum!
"We're British! Mars is part of the empire now."
Anyway, the episode was more solid than top notch Doctor Who. The first time around, I remember finding it pretty dull, a filler story that didn't quite stick. But watching it again, I realised I enjoyed it much more than I thought I would.
The setting itself is fun. The idea of Victorian soldiers stranded on Mars with Ice Warriors is so wonderfully Doctor Who. It is the ridiculous premise that only this show can give. As is always the case as well, it has something to say, this asked questions about empires, expansion and the price of conquest.
And that’s where the episode really hit me, because it is impossible not to reflect on what the British Empire actually was. Genocide, slavery, concentration camps, racism, exploitation on a global scale.
Was the British Empire really any better than the Nazis? Why do the royal family so celebrated when they have been so involved in all of this pain? You see in this episode what it must have been like - the soldiers thought they had the right to Mars. It was just another thing to add.
"Oh, sod this for a game of soldiers."
That’s what I appreciated about this episode on second viewing. It doesn’t really glorify those soldiers. Yes, it gives a few of them sympathetic moments, but it ultimately shows them as arrogant intruders out of their depth. The Ice Warriors, meanwhile, are treated with far more dignity and complexity. Iraxxa, the Empress, is powerful, ruthless, but not without compassion. She shows more humanity than humans themselves.
I won't lie, I have no idea who Alpha Centauri is to this day, so that little cameo meant bugger all to me.
I wouldn’t put Empress of Mars up there with the greats, it’s an episode I’ve come to appreciate much more. It’s creepy in places, entertaining throughout, and it says a bit about the ugliness of our history.
What did you think of Empress of Mars? Should I not use the word chav? Let me know in the comments below.
RATING: Good!
BEST LINE: You will die with honour, with bravery, and in the service of those you swore to protect.
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